September 23–October 22
All OF a sudden, right when it seems like the world has stopped turning, you’ve got new opportunities coming out of your ears. Your love life is positively thriving. You look different for some reason. Is it your hair? All this to say: beware. Your stomach is about to betray you. A kitchen staple will wreak havoc on that beautiful digestive system of yours. When it’s all over, eat crackers.
October 23–November 21
You’re dangerously close to losing it on the next person who stands too close to you. Your tolerance for careless people is at an all-time low. And while we totally support COVID-related public callouts, confrontation might not be what’s best for your mental health. A giant bowl of soup with hearty ingredients like beans and corn will comfort
you in these trying times. Feed the fire inside.
November 22– December 21
Now’s the time to take on new challenges—except in your personal life. Best to play it safe there. There are plenty of online tutorials on making dumplings if you’re looking for an emotionally fulfilling pursuit.
December 22–January 19
You’re feeling really good about yourself right now. Don’t let anyone stop your cheer train. Snacking on a banana will keep those sunshine vibes bright.
January 20–February 18
You’re more concerned about your public image than usual, but people aren’t being as critical as you think they are. Eat that fancy pasta dish you’ve been craving since March.
February 19–March 20
A good work ethic is getting harder and harder to maintain. Feed your brain with leafy greens and reward small tasks with crunchy snacks, like peanuts. If you’re allergic, you’re out of luck.
March 21–April 19
We get it, you want to be alone. You’re not unfriendly, you’re doing your part for the good of humankind. Chow down on a burrito the size of your head. No one wants to witness that, anyway.
April 20–May 20
You’re in for big complications this month (very on brand for 2020) so don’t take on anything too difficult. Cup noodles with an egg cracked in never hurt anyone.
May 21–June 20
You desperately want to party. Your heart beats with a yearning for celebration. Live it up by getting two scoops of ice cream in a waffle cone. It’s
June 21–July 22
Someone new is entering your life. They might even be entering your bubble. Think sharable small plates like chicken wings or dips. Fight them for the last bite.
July 23–August 22
Your professional life is
going to be positively bonkers this season. Meal prepping for the week will give you some semblance of control. Eat lots of rice.
August 23–September 22
Your finances seem good right now, but there are no guarantees these days. Stick to the top half of any menu and don’t eat out too often. Squash is your friend.