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The ClaimJuicing detoxes the body, resets your gut, boosts your energy levels, and even shaves a few pounds off in the process. At least, that’s what we’re being sold—and what Vancouverites are buying in large volumes, if the surge in local juiceries is any indication. I and a fellow guinea pig put those claims to the test with a three-day, juice-only cleanse.The TrialIt didn’t get off to a good start. Within 30 minutes of waking up on the first day of the juice cleanse I hated my life and I hated this stupid column. My head hurt, I felt dizzy, and I wanted to curl up in a ball and cry. Unfortunately for me, my fellow cleanser was feeling on top of the world: “I’m pretty sure I’ve already lost weight,” he texted me. “Feeling pretty good.”The VerdictAs it turns out, I cannot stomach juiced dill. Nor juiced beets. Nor juiced turmeric. In fact, it got to the point that every time I put the juice in or around my mouth, my gut started gurgling and I wanted to vomit. Yes, I enjoyed the easy—sorry, the least nutritious—juice, which was made up of coconut water, pineapple juice, and chia seeds, while I was able to tolerate the tomato-based juice number five because it tasted a bit like a bad Caesar (and really, who hasn’t had a few of those?). But as for the other four? No chance.Ultimately, a juice cleanse package was not for me. I could barely stand the taste of each bottle, to the extent that I was basically starving myself, although my fellow tester enjoyed it enough to attempt a five-day cleanse. Yes, replacing your daily coffee with a juice will add extra vitamins to your diet, as the proponents of juice-based cleanses suggest. But losing three pounds is not worth starving yourself for three days, reset gut or not.D.I.Y.The Juice Truck, three-day program, $195If you’re talking about juicing in Vancouver, someone will recommend this Main Street hot spot Krokodile Pear, Green Run, $150Blending avocado and banana makes these juices more of an appealing entry point for rookiesSexy Juice, three-day cleanse, $162Includes six different juices and can be delivered straight to your doorstep.