Fashion

Add to Cart: A Jumpsuit Worth Getting Naked in the Park Bathroom

To love is to sacrifice.

By Alyssa Hirose /

Add to Cart is Vanmag’s weekly style column, in which assistant editor Alyssa Hirose offers honest takes on current trends, local designs, and whatever new clothes/jewellery/shoes she’s talking herself into (or out of) buying.

It is socially illegal to not make a comment when your friend wears a jumpsuit. I mean it. If you’re meeting a buddy for a park hangout, stroll up to them already perfectly perched on their blanket (they arrived before you, of course, on account of their convenient all-in-one outfit), and don’t say something like “I love your jumpsuit” or “You look adorable” or “Marry me,” you’re a monster.

It’s like saying “Excuse me” or “Thank you” or “We should get together sometime” when you run into a high school acquaintance who lowkey bullied you for years and you never want to see ever again. It’s just polite. 

And it’s one of the reasons why wearing a jumpsuit feels so good—with the added bonus of speed (again, it’s a one-stop ensemble) and ultimate flexibility. Ideal for those emergency cartwheel situations.

It’s the perfect park picnic outfit in all but one category: the bathroom. Trips to public bathrooms during COVID (and honestly, pre-COVID too) are usually not pleasant. Add that you have to get half naked as you hover over the toilet and pray some desperate drunk parkgoer doesn’t break the door in, and it becomes an extreme sport.

In my opinion, though, it’s worth it. Take The Latest Scoop’s new Just Peachy Jumpsuit, for example. The muted orange pattern (the print is also clearly oranges, so whoever named it needs Pomology 101) is very fun. It has a “drop crotch” made for sitting on a blanket and basking in the adoration of friends. And, say it with me people, it has pockets.

So yeah, going to the bathroom is going to suck.  At least you’ll get some killer quads.

The Look: The Latest Scoop’s Just Peachy Jumpsuit
The Price: $116
Where to Find it: The Latest Scoop stores or thelatestscoop.ca
Where to Wear it: Sitting cross-legged at Dude Chilling Park, devouring a book in a sunny reading nook, eating a popsicle while leaning up against an ice cream truck that hopefully isn’t sticky