Granville Pub Crawl

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( 1 ) Uva Wine Bar  Ease into the night at this stylish off-strip hotel bar. Skinny-jeaned designers and on-the-prowl opticians size up the night’s prey. Start out best foot forward with a Don’t Give Up the Ship cocktail: gin, Dubonnet, Fernet Branca, and Cointreau. 900 Seymour St., 604-632-9560.

( 2 ) Deuce Bungalow Spanglish Cantina  The faux-bordello look is getting a little old around town, but the friendly staff at this oddster are easy to look at, and the clientele—older than the nom—keep the place lively. As the name suggests, Latin-inspired food’s a focus here, but easy on the avocado fries. The chandeliers will only look prettier through the bottom of a mojito glass. 980 Granville St.,604-688-2969.

( 3 )  El Furniture Warehouse Amid Granville’s glitz, EF wears its grot proudly. Cheap cocktails (third free!) prime dirty girls’ pumps, but stick to just one at the bar for liquid courage. Jager’s on tap, and if you’re lucky the Jager girls will swing by with branded condoms. Is that Loverboy on the laptop? 989 Granville St., 604-677-8080.

( 4 ) Circa Restaurant & Lounge  Everybody’s tanned, everybody’s just been to Brazil, everybody can dance. Sexy house on the ones and twos gets a kick from DIY congas and maracas, as the cavernous spot fills with tailored suits and backless frocks. And who’d have guessed a deep B.C. wine list? Get serious with a full-bodied red, like LFNG’s Portfolio. And let the night unfold…1050 Granville St., 604-683-3311.

( 5 ) Red Squared Tapas Lounge  Bond-glam vibe and a pulsing ambient soundtrack greet high-hemmed party girls and the men they call “Papi.” The inventive fusion menu roves Eastern Europe with comparable panache. On the beverage front, choose from over 80 types of vodka. We love the peaty Phrog from Hornby Island, straight up on ice. 1216 Granville St,. 604-408-6352.

El Furniture Warehouse You should go home. You do not want to end up back here for a descent into food fights and body shots. Do you?